April 20, 2015

Who's That New Guy??!

Hey guys.

So....

Miss me?

I bet you do.

I miss you too.

Anyway I've been losing my blogging mood for so long. And this morning I woke up feeling like "hey, I miss writing and I miss my blog. I think it's time for me to update about my life."

And..... here I am. 

First thing first, I am no longer working at that awesome place I worked before. I had a really great time, gained a lot of experiences (and weight), met a lot of awesome people and learned a whole lot of things. I am really thankful that my first job after I graduate was there at C H Williams. It was such a fun experience and if I had the choice I would definitely go back there to work. However I have other plans ahead of me and I had to quit. 

Missing all these crazy people!!

I will definitely keep you guys updated about that "other" plan when I think it's the right time to tell. In the meantime, I am working with my Dad. It's definitely not my line or industry, but hey it's temporary before I figure my life out. Still gotta work to pay the bills, hence this job. Lol.

So yeah, career wise, I am still working on it. Still in progress but everything is good so far.

I'm sure some of you who are following me on Instagram and Twitter have some questions for me. Hehe because I've been receiving questions about it. So whatever I'm about to tell you, you heard it here first! Typing this makes me nervous. I'm having second thoughts about publishing something so personal about my life but I figured that since it's been so long since I abandoned my blog, I might as well make it up to you readers by being transparent with you guys. 

Okay guys, yes. I have a new guy in my life right now in case you are wondering when you saw my pictures on Instagram and all the tweets I've been RT-ing and posting. I've been through a heartache for almost 2 years and I finally found back my happiness. Trust me, these past couple of years I've been nothing but miserable. I came to a conclusion that I don't want to fall in love and I don't want to get married. I'd rather be successful and alone than living through a heartache. Well, that was what I thought. 

Until I said yes to this guy (let's just call him the new guy, for now yea? Hehe) when he asked me out. I've never said yes to any guy who asked me out after my big break up in 2013. But somehow, with this new guy, I considered. I had my doubts though, so of course like always, I went to Mom for advice. My Mom said it's okay to give it a try with this one and so, I did. Never did I expect that things will turn out this way. I enjoy his company so much that we've been spending so much time together since then. 

Now I can finally say that yes, I've moved on from the 7 years of relationship before. In case you are wondering, no I did not regret anything. I'm sure if you have been following me for quite some time, you would know who my boyfriend was. I have been with him since the first I started this blog and the memories we had are priceless. It is also not wrong to say that I am still friends with him until now. I've known him since we were 9, of course I wouldn't just forget about him. People have been asking me how did I move on. Well, let me tell you something. It wasn't easy. It took me a couple of years, after all. My tip is to be patient. That is all, seriously. There's nothing that you can do except wait as time heals everything. You can't force yourself to stop having feelings towards someone. When the feeling is there, it's there.  But have faith in yourself, that everything will work out just fine. It may be difficult, you might cry yourself to sleep every night but trust me, it will turn the other way around sooner or later. I am a living proof of that. I was having the most difficult time, I used to cry a lot, mood swings and all but look at me now. I'm happy. Everything turned out perfectly fine, but of course I don't want to jinx it so, I'll stop talking about how happy I am right now. The moment I stopped stalking and checking on my ex's social medias, that's when I know I have really moved on. Anyway, moral of the story is, to whoever asked me for tips on how I moved on, I only have one thing to say ; Be patient. 

Don't ever let a heartbreak ruin you. I didn't believe in love but I am totally smitten right now. So, just wait. God has someone better for you in the future so you don't need to rush things and jump to conclusions like I did. You can wait for the right one and remember God always knows best. He knows who is good for you and who's not. Who knows, you are facing all this because He wants you to be stronger so you'll be able to walk on your own feet before you share your love with someone else. If there's one thing I learned from the break up, it's definitely to love myself more. I didn't give myself enough credit that I deserve. I am worth more than that and now I realized that I need to learn to love myself more before I learn to love someone else. Now I truly believe in the saying "Don't find love, let the love find you" because when this new guy asked me out, I wasn't looking for a relationship. Heck, I wasn't even thinking of being attached to anyone and I actually vowed to myself to not love again. But suddenly he came into the picture and he can make me laugh at 3 am in the morning. He makes me feel all these feelings I hadn't felt for the longest time. He makes me happy, he makes me feel warm and fluffy inside, he makes me nervous in a good way and he makes me smile reading his texts everyday. I wasn't even looking but it just feels right.

Everyone has a different love story. Either you are marrying your high school sweetheart, or you're getting engaged with someone you just met for 5 months, it doesn't matter because everything happens for a reason, every individual walked into your life for a reason and God has everything planned out for us. You don't have to worry about it. Duration doesn't imply how pure your love is towards someone and how serious your relationship is. When you are in a long term relationship but don't feel happy anymore, ask yourself this : "Are you in love with the person you're in a relationship with or are you in love with the duration of the relationship and the memories you both made along the way?". It was hard for me because I was in love with all the memories we had and the 7 years we've been together. 

So guys, think.

Make sure of your own feelings before you decide on anything. It helps to really know your feelings instead of believing yourself and your heart straight away without thinking about it thoroughly. 

"You fall in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time."

This time, I am praying for the best.
InsyaAllah, he is the one.
Bismillah.

3 comments:

aishahjaffar said...

Aww, Ayeen. So glad you found your happiness again :) Missed your blogging by the way :D

Ayeen Kadir said...

Hi Aishah! Thank you so much! And yess, I missed blogging too!! Gotta work on my motivation to blog and vlog again :D

MakeupWith Rubynee said...

Hi, I am from New Jersey. All the best and congrats for your future plans. I want a blog post on your wedding with this guy. Lots of love from me
Xoxo Rubynee